November 10, 1995
Dear Nayeon,
For some reason, if I know that the compliments are coming from you, I will feel even more… What’s the word? Flustered? Shy? I’m not sure. But I’ll try. For you. Because you said so.
I’m feeling better by the way. Could be because of your letters. The doorman to my apartment always says that when your letters arrive, it’s the time of the month where I have the biggest smile on my face. He’s not wrong. I always do when I find out that I got a letter from you, then I’d waltz to the lift with your envelope in hand and I clutch it close to my chest, unable to contain my excitement because I want to read what you’ve written. So yeah, I do feel better.
It could be. They’ve been dating since high school. Mina was an exchange student from Japan and Chaeyoung had this big loser crush on her since the beginning. But I guess Mina has a thing for big, loser, artsy girls because they sure hit it off when they finally confessed to each other. I think they’re meant to be. They complement each other and they’re very gentle in any situation. I find myself wondering if I’ll ever find something like that. But again, like what I’ve said before, I haven’t yet. Well… I’m not sure if it’s there but I’m actively wondering if there is love for me out there. Maybe there is and I’m just afraid to find it. But at the same time, how would I know when I don’t know the feeling? But that could be me.
And, it’s nice to meet you too Im Nayeon, 30 years old that lives in Gangdong-gu, who is the eldest in her family and likes gummy snacks (I remember) and that has a mysterious job in the media. :) You are right. It’s like we're introducing ourselves even if I feel like I’ve known you since forever. And I want to keep knowing about you too.
Also, thank you for sharing something personal. I can’t believe you actually were in a car accident. But how’s your leg now? I hope that doesn’t affect your daily living. And of course you can trust me.
I guess the only secret I have that I don’t really like sharing was about the time I actually had a crush on Tzuyu. It was a long time ago. It was also in high school, Chaeyoung, Tzuyu and I were classmates, and we did almost everything together. But since Chaeyoung had her attention on Mina, Tzuyu was always with me. And we got really close, like I’d consider her as my best friend just like how Chaeyoung is my best friend. Then next thing I knew, I just… liked being with Tzuyu and it was evident that I liked her because all I could think about was her. But I wasn’t sure what was happening most of the time because I had no idea what it was like to have feelings for someone. I just knew that Tzuyu was so important to me, and I imagined being in a relationship with her. It didn’t last because she told me she had feelings for someone else and that was mutual. I didn’t want to ruin it, so I decided to let it go. I’m fine now though. We’re still really great friends and I came to terms that it was just something that never could have happened. I guess it’s also the reason why I’m still so clueless about feelings and love. But I’ve accepted the fact that if it didn’t happen with Tzuyu, then I’m sure it would happen with someone else. I’m still waiting.
What is it like to fall in love?
Sincerely,
Dahyun
And for some reason, her heart was beating really fast when she finished writing the letter.
It was happening again.
She didn’t know why.
Why was she suddenly nervous? Why was she anticipating the answer when she knew that Nayeon wouldn’t be able to ask in the next few days or weeks.
Why did she feel more dread that the person that she asked was Nayeon?
What was she feeling?
Maybe her questions would be answered when she was going to receive Nayeon’s letter.
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