Hopes

Their vacation didn’t last, as much as they wanted it to. But both of them had a lot of fun and Dahyun was thankful that Nayeon was able to enjoy as much as she could.

Dahyun met her parents and little sister, which was, surprisingly, not a problem compared to her experience when meeting Sana and Momo the first time. Nayeon’s dad kept his questions limited, mostly about her job and source of income, while Nayeon’s mother asked nothing but if she was hungry or not.

Her sister was timid compared to Nayeon, but was as sassy as her. Maybe it ran in the blood, since her dad showed the same attitude when the three would bicker over meals. It was endearing, and it made Dahyun love Nayeon even more. She was just thankful that Nayeon’s family had accepted her so easily.

When they got back to Seoul, Nayeon had a few more days before her leave ended, so Dahyun decided to give her the freedom to choose whatever she wanted to do. Dahyun desperately wanted to help her out, but she had been away from the coworking space for too long and she also needed to get back to work.

But for some reason, Nayeon decided to get back to work even when she didn’t had to go into her office. And because of that, Dahyun soon realized that her girlfriend barely left her apartment because she was busy with reviewing articles and getting on the phone with important people.

Dahyun would send Nayeon simple reminders through text that her girlfriend should still take things slow because she was just fresh out of vacation and going straight to work kind of defeated the purpose of it.

Because comparing how Nayeon was before the leave, to when they arrived in Seoul, to her when she went back to work, there wasn’t much of a difference.

Nayeon was still drowning herself in her work, and Dahyun wasn’t entirely sure what to do.

But her girlfriend explained that she was trying to take things as slow as possible, whatever that meant, and assured Dahyun that she wouldn’t skip meals like before. Though, that didn’t really stop Dahyun from worrying.

So whenever she could, and because she finally managed to hire someone to help her manage the space, Dahyun would leave by lunch time, take her scooter all the way to Nayeon’s building just to deliver her food. On good days, she was able to share the meal with her girlfriend, but when things got hectic on Nayeon's end, Dahyun had no choice but to engage in small talk with the secretary and end up handing her the food to give to Nayeon.

It came to a point where Dahyun messaged Jennie through social media just so that there would be someone who could remind Nayeon to pay attention to her needs and not because of work.

And it was like this for a while, probably three weeks to a month, and Dahyun was trying not to mind it. She was trying. But she didn’t know how long it would take for her to lose her hold. Because it could go on for months, and she shouldn’t just let this happen. She had to put her foot down if ever Nayeon’s work habits were going to hinder anything.

But she would always remember what Nayeon said, what Mina and her friends told her. A lot of people left Nayeon because she couldn’t get herself to stop working. So, she had to be vigilant. She had to be strong. Because she loved Nayeon, with everything she had.

Dahyun was getting ready, it was their one-year anniversary as a couple and her being excited was an understatement. Because she booked the fanciest restaurant in the city, a nice table for two, candle lit dinner on a balcony and nothing but their undivided attention.

But what was making Dahyun nervous was the velvet casing that was kept snug inside her purse.

It didn’t take her that much thought when Chaeyoung and her friends asked if she was absolutely sure about Nayeon. Because if they asked her again, Dahyun would say yes, maybe faster than the first time.

She sighed, it was hard enough to ask Nayeon out on a second date, but now she was going to pop the question and she really wasn’t sure if she would be able to handle her jitters.

Chaeyoung knocked on her door frame, leaning on it as she smiled at Dahyun. “You’re beautiful.”

Dahyun turned around and presented the simple dress she had on, grabbing the skirt and swaying it a bit, “Do I look like a homeless person?”

Her best friend laughed, pushed herself off the jamb and gently hugged Dahyun from behind. “No, you asshat. You look beautiful and after tonight you’re going to come home as ‘soon-to-be marrying Im Nayeon, the woman of my dreams’.”

That made Dahyun laugh, leaning her head on Chaeyoung’s head and sighed again. “I hope she says yes.”

“That’s no question. I know she’s going to say yes.” Chaeyoung pulled away and grabbed something from her pocket, then she draped it over Dahyun’s neck, securing it. “There.” Chaeyoung carefully fixed Dahyun's long, black hair and they were looking at each other in the mirror.

Dahyun touched the necklace, “Where did you get this?”

“I bought it,” Chaeyoung said smugly. “I got a raise, and a good recommendation from the office about the Japan promotion, and I wanted to give a little something to celebrate your big thing—“

Chaeyoung got interrupted when Dahyun turned around and threw her arms around her friend for a big, tight hug. Dahyun nuzzled her head further into Chaeyoung’s neck. “Thank you, Chaeng. You’re the best.”

“Anything for you.” Chaeyoung sighed as she hugged Dahyun back in the same intensity.

The two swayed each other for a bit until Dahyun’s phone interrupted them. Jeongyeon was calling to let her know she was waiting downstairs. Dahyun said she wanted to be driven to the restaurant since she decided to wear a dress that night and she knew Nayeon was going to bring her car.

So as Chaeyoung sent them off, Dahyun was finally on the way, checking her bag every now and then and getting last minute breathing lessons from Jeongyeon.

She was nervous. Terrified even. Was it too soon to propose? Yes, it was. But did it feel right? Of course, it did. Nayeon and her have already had talks about them settling down. Nayeon was stable enough to keep them afloat, Dahyun was willing to put in the work if ever Nayeon would get busy.

In fact, Dahyun was ready to make the biggest sacrifice she could think of if it meant that she would be with Nayeon for the rest of her life.

Plus, she already had the blessing from Nayeon’s family, so all that was left was Nayeon’s answer. Of course, her girlfriend had no idea that this was something she planned on doing. Nayeon just assumed it was going to be a nice dinner to celebrate their anniversary.

It was going to be perfect, because Nayeon didn't know anything and Dahyun was absolutely ready.

Jeongyeon finally dropped her off, and they bid their goodbyes with a big hug as well, Jeongyeon wishing her luck before she left. Dahyun took a deep breath again as she stepped into the restaurant. She left Nayeon a couple of messages telling her that she was already at the restaurant.

Sure, her not receiving any messages from her girlfriend was normal. It was a bad habit they worked around, because Nayeon was busy as always. But she didn’t have to worry because Nayeon always pushed through, and this was a special occasion. There was no exception. She knew that Nayeon was going to be there.

Dahyun got seated on their table by the waiter, one of them delivered the bouquet of fresh roses as she had planned earlier. Thanking them with a big smile and placing it on her side of the table, taking sips from the water that was served to her.

She checked her phone, feeling a bit uneasy seeing how Nayeon hasn’t messaged her yet. But she kept her phone and took a deep breath. It was probably just her nerves talking.

Because there was nothing in this world that was going to prevent her from letting this happen. She wasn’t going to ruin it, not going to let her nerves and anxiety get the best of her. She was sure that she would be able to do this without a hitch.

But as minutes passed, it became ten to fifteen to thirty minutes. Dahyun tried to call Nayeon’s phone but there was no answer. She tried calling Jennie, but even her workmate wasn’t sure where Nayeon was because she went home early that day. Maybe Dahyun could call the driver, since she had his number, but even he wasn’t answering.

Dahyun sighed deeply, waiting patiently for Nayeon to show up. Maybe she was going to surprise her by showing up out of nowhere, but every time she looked around the restaurant, her eyes glued to the entrance, Dahyun felt like she was starting to believe that Nayeon wasn’t going to show up.

And the thirty minutes became an hour, then it became an hour and thirty minutes. The flowers weren’t fresh, Dahyun drank so much water that she desperately wanted to go to the bathroom, but she didn’t want to because she might miss Nayeon if she did.

“Uh, Miss Kim?” the waiter called out to her, seeming hesitant to approach but Dahyun acknowledged him. “I know your date hasn’t shown up, but it’s already nine in the evening and we have to take our last orders now.”

As usual, Dahyun answered with a smile. “Actually, I think I’ll just take my leave, Taeyoung,” she said in defeat, standing up and smoothening out her dress. “I’m sorry I wasted your table.”

The blonde immediately waved at her and suddenly had a paper bag given to him by his co-worker. “No worries, Miss Kim. You had this reservation for a week already. Plus, the restaurant wasn’t packed tonight.” He then rubbed the back of his neck, “I’m really sorry.”

She smiled, somehow not sure what she was feeling. “Thank you, Taeyoung. I’ll take my leave then. Thank you for the doggy bag.” She waved the bag, grabbed the flowers and walked out of the restaurant.

Dahyun took one last check on her phone, and to no surprise, there was still nothing from Nayeon. Did she forget about the dinner? She was sure that Nayeon confirmed it that morning before she went to work. What went wrong? Did Nayeon know about her plan? Did she change her mind about them?

There were several scenarios playing in her head, but Dahyun knew that waiting for another hour was going to be useless.

So instead, she hailed a cab, got inside and told the driver to bring her back to her apartment. Nayeon should have a reason and Dahyun wasn’t sure how she was going to react if she found out what it was.

She leaned her head on the window of the car and stared outside, fighting the tears that threatened to escape from her eyes. Nayeon had to have a reason, Dahyun repeated to herself. Nayeon loved her, loved her enough to tell her if something important came up. Or maybe she got into an accident as she was on her way to the restaurant. But Nayeon had her on her emergency contacts, so if something did happen, then she would have been alerted immediately.

A vibration finally came to her phone and Dahyun checked. When she read the message, she felt even more defeated. She knew she was weak too, and that even if she had so much love for Nayeon, she had to choose herself.

9:12 PM