December 14, 1995
Everything was going according to plan.
Dahyun spent an exuberant amount of time with her family, spent an entire day at Chaeyoung and Mina’s new house and even took the time to visit the church she used to frequent.
It was nice. Seeing everyone again felt amazing.
And now that she finally had the time, she was going to see Nayeon.
She thought about leaving a message, maybe asking someone to deliver a letter on the same day, but a part of her felt the weird desire to be spontaneous. Because that was somewhat romantic, right?
That Dahyun could come and surprise Nayeon, hand her flowers which she had at that moment, they would share a look that they both knew and understand and then maybe Nayeon was going to run into her arms, or if she couldn’t contain it, she would be the one to run into Nayeon’s arms and they finally could embrace each other.
A full proof plan.
Dahyun could imagine it happening. And she felt her chest twist and ache because of the unexpected, the anticipation was getting to her nerves that she had no idea how she was able to stand in front of Nayeon’s extremely expensive looking apartment building without her legs giving out.
“Wow,” she breathed out, watching the expanse of the building before her. She didn’t know there was such a luxury apartment building in this area.
Was this the reason why Nayeon didn’t want to say what her job was? Maybe she was a newscaster or something.
But that wasn’t what mattered at the moment. Dahyun shook her head, grasped the bouquet of white lilies in her hand and took a deep breath.
Tzuyu and Chaeyoung were waiting at the parking lot for her, and they gave her the amount of luck she needed. So, she wasn’t going to chicken out.
She was going to do this. She was going to see the woman that she had been writing to for months and had fallen helplessly in love with.
It didn’t matter to her what Nayeon’s physical appearance was, Dahyun believed that the moment their eyes would meet, her heart was going to tell her what felt right.
With another deep breath, she finally stepped out of her spot and walked up to the entrance of the building. The doorman greeted her with a polite smile and a bow, Dahyun returned the gesture, feeling compelled to thank anyone who had been kind to Nayeon.
She glanced around, the ambiance of the lobby made her knees wobbly. She felt out of place, and it increased her nerves.
At least there was no one around. Just her, the doorman and the woman behind the receptionist’s desk.
This was it. She was going to do it.
She walked up to the desk and when the woman looked up, she smiled and the woman smiled back, greeting her politely.
“Good morning,” Dahyun greeted back, still feeling as if she was going to crumble with each word she was going to utter. “I was hoping to see Im Nayeon?”
The woman raised a brow, looking at her partner that sat beside her, hands clenching suddenly. “Are you a friend?” she asked, a bit of hesitation in her tone.
Dahyun felt even more anxious, but she swallowed it and nodded. “Yes, I am.”
The male receptionist immediately picked up the telephone that was in front of her and smiled at Dahyun. “One moment, please.”
Dahyun was confused. But she nodded either way, wanting to still be polite even if she had no idea what was happening. Was it really that strict in this apartment building?
It could be, because of how fancy it looked. Dahyun’s initial thought of Nayeon being a celebrity came to her mind again, but she quickly shrugged it off because she didn’t want to assume anything.
The chances were impossible. Maybe Nayeon was just rich. Dahyun shouldn’t assume.
She waited patiently as the man quietly spoke to the person through the phone, hoping it was Nayeon. Maybe if she said her name, Nayeon would have let her in already. Or maybe Nayeon could meet her at the lobby.
Maybe she should have said her name first before anything, that would have changed things. Dahyun tried to speak, but her nervousness got the best of her, making her immobilized, temporarily mute and that wasn’t supposed to happen.
She cursed herself, trying to force herself to say something. But the man placed the telephone down and whispered to the other receptionist. They made a few exchanges and the two faced her again. “Miss Im is out of town until the 24th and her manager advised that you could leave your name, and we’ll let her know that you passed by,” the woman said with a polite smile.
“Oh—” the words were caught in her throat. Not expecting this at all. Dahyun gripped the flowers even tighter, feeling foolish suddenly. “Uh… Just say Kim Dahyun came to visit. But it’s okay, it’s nothing important,” she said, trying to dismiss everything.
Dahyun suddenly felt like she wasn’t important and everything that she and Nayeon had become a big question mark.
But then that wouldn’t be right. She felt it. There could be another reason as to why this was happening. Maybe Dahyun just didn’t have the right timing. There was a date when Nayeon would be back, so she could wait until then. Even if it had to be after Christmas.
She bowed to the lady instead, gripping onto the flowers, feeling the stems break in her palm. “Thank you.”
Dahyun didn’t wait for a response and walked away, not wanting the receptionist to see how disappointed she was. Was she really feeling disappointed? It felt more sadness than anything. Maybe because she got her hopes up for nothing. Something that couldn’t happen yet.
Nayeon had a reason, she told herself. She had a reason and Dahyun just needed to be patient again. Just like every time Nayeon’s letter came in late—
Letter.
Right.
Dahyun was already outside the building when she patted her coat quickly, remembering that she had a letter she wanted to give.
It made no sense to give it to Nayeon, but she needed some proof that Dahyun really did come over. Word of mouth couldn’t be trusted all the time.
She went back inside the lobby and walked straight to the receptionist again.
“Excuse me,” she called to the lady, who looked at her with a smile. Dahyun then took out the letter from her coat and handed it to her. “Can you give this to her when she comes back?”
The woman smiled kindly, taking the letter with her two hands. “Yes, I can do that.”
Dahyun sighed, nodding her head. “Thank you.”
Then she finally turned around and left.
Dahyun was in her living room, staring blankly at the lilies she had bought, now placed delicately in a vase by her mother.
Her mother knew. It was something that Dahyun couldn’t hold in and she was always transparent to her mother about everything. She was aware that it went against their beliefs, but her mother’s love was far more powerful than anything. That was one thing that she found relief in. Her father didn't mind, her mother was insisting to meet Nayeon already, making things a little bit more bittersweet and her brother didn't really show much care. Which was normal because he was always like that. Dahyun knew that he just wanted her to be happy.
Which she was.
She was happy.
Despite the situation she was in, she was still happy. Nayeon was going to be available after Christmas, so Dahyun still had time to see her.
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