departure and promises

In the case of forgetting, you will be able to remember the feelings associated with it. You might forget how warm her body was. You might forget how soft her lips were. You might forget how she looked into your eyes when you were on her lap. Your brain is going to fabricate some memories, distorting the events as time goes by. Luckily, you're going to remember how happy you were.

You're jolted awake by an alarm, and you're pretty sure that it's not from your phone.

The warm sensation around your body tightens for a split second with a deep, sweet groan. You jump a bit in the embrace before it loosens, and the ringing alarm is stopped.

"Fuck."

You recognize the voice instantly, and the memories of last night come back in a stream of consciousness that puts your brain into being cognizant again. That notion is simple: you just slept with your ultimate bias — Oh Haewon of NMIXX.

You're still lying on your side when she wraps her arms around you again, nestling her chin on your shoulder. Her chest is pressed against your back. The room is dark, and the sun hasn't risen yet. She lets out a whine on top of you, throwing her bare leg over yours.

"Hey," you greet, still trying to stir yourself awake within her arms. Haewon squeezes your body again along with a chuckle, and that helps with the process.

"Morning," she responds groggily, and she plants a few kisses on the left side of your neck. You shudder with each peck. "Slept well?"

You giggle. "Yeah," and you scoot into Haewon's arms a bit more. Her body is warm against yours. She hugs you tenderly and tightly. "Was a good night."

Haewon hums beside you as a response, and she just stays there for a while. You begin to absorb the physical sensations and the events of last night quietly. There's her body against yours. There's her kissing your lips. There's a smile because of you. It was an out-of-reach wish just yesterday — before the fateful concert — and now, you're settling yourself within Oh Haewon's arms.

Still, you're bracing yourself for the inevitable: her departure. You don't want her to go — not like this, at least. Your body craves another second of her body, and then there's going to be another second that you need. It'll just go on perpetually to the end of time.

You wish you could keep her close forever.

"The flight is at 11," Haewon finally breaks the silence, also shattering your trance in her embrace. It's probably five right now, judging from the sun that hasn't risen yet in June.

"Do you have to prepare for the airport?"

"Yeah," she answers, drawing circles on your shoulder mindlessly. Her breath is brushing your cheek.

"How long do we have?" and you hold her hands on your chest tighter. Haewon shifts a bit behind you.

"Not enough."

You're in the same clothes as last night. You're wearing Haewon's perfume. You're standing with your back against the door.

She's in a set of casual clothes, albeit looking fashionable enough for the fan-sites. She's wearing her own perfume. She's standing in front of you.

The entrance light is shining onto the top of her head, highlighting the brown dye above her roots. She's so close her minty breath is warm against your face. The tip of her nose is a tad reddish. You smell her and yourself standing here.

"Thanks for everything, especially for last night," Haewon starts. She tucks strands of her hair behind her ear. You see more of her face.

A smile appears on your face — surely sincere. "Thank you, too, for giving this gooner a chance."

Haewon chuckles, pointing a finger at you. It's not accusative or anything along those lines, obviously. "Make sure you get a VIP seat the next time, alright?"

"I'll try to be quick enough," you answer. "The bots are fucking ruthless."

Haewon's smile fades slightly. "Sorry that I can't do anything for you."

"It's risky. I get it," and a soft smile appears on your mouth. "I know you'll look for me."

"Definitely."