ELEVEN

So I was hearing correctly the day of my departure. Still … what was Jessica doing here? Not that I was disappointed or anything; far from it, I was ecstatic. “Fany, do you mind if I go over there to greet a friend from college? You should come too, I’m sure you two will like each other,” I said excitedly.

However, when I turned around to look at Tiffany, she appeared … apprehensive? Seeing this go-getter, energetic, happy-go-lucky person as she was stopped me in my tracks.

“Fany? What’s wrong?” I asked, leaning to my side, tilting my head to peer at her face.

She blinked once, a smile immediately replacing whatever expression her face had just taken. “Oh, sorry … I just thought—” she paused for the briefest of seconds, “I just thought she looked like someone.”

I looked back at Jessica, who still hadn’t noticed me yet. I always thought that Jessica had a pretty unique aesthetic; maybe I was mistaken?

“Anyway, I’m not too keen on meeting the woman who’s stealing my TaeTae,” she claimed, crossing her arms defiantly.

I frowned, grabbing her wrists. “Fany~” I whined, shaking her arm, “Come oon,” I started pulling on her arm whilst she stood there, a smile plastered on her face for some mysterious reason, “I’m sure you two will like each other!”

“I don’t know, I don’t like her already for stealing your attention away from me,” she said, smiling regardless. As I opened my mouth to refute her, Tiffany continued, “If you show me some aegyo, then I’ll be willing to join you.”

I didn’t even hesitate. “Bbuing bbuing~” I said in the cutest voice I could muster, rubbing both of my clenched fists against my cheeks.

“You’re just the cutest!” Tiffany squealed, immediately embracing me in a hug. I was trying my best not to mind her ample bust pressing against my face. “How can I say no to that?”

I broke out into a smile, grabbing her hand and pulling her towards Jessica, making sure to grab our towel first. “Jessica!” I shouted as we approached her. As our gazes met, her eyes went wide in shock—her mouth opened but nothing escaped her lips. That was strange; if she knew she was going to Korea and even told me about it, then why would she be surprised to see me?

“Taengoo! Hi! Didn’t expect to see you here!” she replied, turning around to face us. She was wearing a simple dark red bikini with the bra straps leaving her shoulders exposed. “Is she a friend from high school?” she inquired, nodding at the woman next to me.

I glanced over to Tiffany, half expecting her to answer as she always does and ready to shoot down her ‘yeah, I’m her girlfriend!’ response, but it never came. Instead, she was fidgeting with her fingers, eyes darting between her hands and myself.

“No, she was a friend I met last week,” I answered. It was strange; I felt like I was answering in her stead, which is nonsensical considering the question was directed towards me.

Just looking at the facial expression forming on Jessica’s face, I could tell that telling the truth was perhaps a suboptimal decision. “Whaat? And it took me two months to become your friend!” she whined, stomping the sand in an imitation of a child’s tantrum.

“Ah,” I again readied myself for Tiffany’s interjection, but it never came. I found myself pausing, wondering if there was something wrong with Tiffany—not to say I wasn’t relieved that she wasn’t causing more misunderstandings, “Well, she’s a bartender and I just … um, I went to the bar she was working at and yeah,” I finished rather inconclusively. I had no doubt in my mind that if I told her what transpired in the past week, Jessica would never let me hear the end of it.

“Ah, ok,” she said, diverting her attention to Tiffany. However, something strange happened: Tiffany seemed at unease from this.

A flood of thoughts crashed into my mind all at once: how Tiffany acts as her post as a bartender, Sooyoung’s words about Tiffany having trouble making friends, Tiffany’s usual energetic behavior, the fact that she befriended me—me—so easily and quickly … why? But how…? Jessica was undoubtedly presenting herself friendlier than I did … why was this happening?

“So you’re Taeyeon’s friend from college?” Tiffany inquired, smiling in a manner I could only describe as cautiously.

“Yeah! My name is Jessica Jung, it’s nice to meet you,” she said, bowing politely.

Whatever was happening with Tiffany ceased at that simple introduction. “Nice to meet you, I’m Tiffany Hwang,” she greeted in kind.

It was only a brief second, but even I could feel it: a kind of awkward feeling that transcended simply ‘being strangers’.

“Wow, you’re so pretty—Taeyeon, did you come to Korea just to cheat on me?”

Jessica responding as she normally did put me at ease. Maybe I was just imaging things after all. “I can’t cheat on someone I’m not in a relationship with,” I told Jessica, “Besides, Fany and I aren’t d—” I felt my mouth freeze as the word came to my mouth; I reset, forcing myself to continue, “—dating or anything.” Stop thinking about that, Taeyeon. And stop blushing.

“Then why is it that you’re wearing a swim suit?” she asked, leaning forward to a point that her face was uncomfortably close to mine, “Especially after all the times you turned me down?”

“You only asked me to go swimsuit shopping once,” I reminded her, carefully increasing the distance between our faces.

Jessica huffed in protest. “Don’t pretend that you didn’t notice all the other times I hinted at it,” she said, eyeing me accusingly.

I put my best I-don’t-know-what-you’re-talking-about face on. “What? You did?”

Jessica whined in response, to which Tiffany laughed.

The sudden sound startled me; despite still holding her hand, I had just about forgotten that Tiffany was standing next to me. Frustrated, I scolded myself; how can you be this stupid, Taeyeon? This is why you have no friends, idiot. “I know what you mean; I had to drag Taeyeon out of her house,” she said. Ok Taeyeon, just don’t do that again. Why were social situations so hard?

“Yeah, she’s a real house-fairy, this one,” Jessica said, patting my head, “You made a good choice with this swimsuit though, it looks amazing on her,” she noted, directing the congratulatory words at Tiffany.

“Thanks! Your—your swimsuit looks pretty nice, too,” Tiffany commented. That caught my attention; up until just now, I couldn’t recall a single time Tiffany stuttered or otherwise was unconfident in her words. Except for that time with her friends, but I think that can be considered an exception.

“Oh, I don’t think I’ve seen that before; it really suits you well!” I told her.

She nodded, turning to face the ocean. “It’s a really nice day to be at the beach, isn’t it?” she said, sitting down on her towel. We joined her, setting down our towel next to hers.

“When did you get to Korea anyway? Do you have somewhere to stay?”

Jessica laughed, patting the back of my hand. “You worry too much, Taengoo-yah. I’m here for an internship and was provided housing not too far from this beach,” she responded.

“Oh, cool! Which company?” I inquired. Jessica shifted, turning to head to meet my gaze. Knowing Jessica, I wondered why she didn’t simply remain laying down—was she trying to address Tiffany as well?

“I don’t think I’m allowed to tell you that; they told me that the nature of what I’m doing, even as an intern, is really sensitive,” she admitted, smiling apologetically.

“Ah, ok. It’s not a problem Sica, don’t worry about it,” I dismissively told her, “But how is it? Do you like it?”

“Hm,” Jessica replied, taking a few seconds to think before answering, “The opportunity they’re giving me is really invaluable to me, but the work itself is sorta … you know?” Jessica shifted once again on the towel she was sitting on, sitting straight up with her legs crossed, staring out into the ocean.

“Why? Are you doing something you feel like you shouldn’t? I’ll help you!” I replied eagerly.

By the time Jessica’s startled expression brought me back to my senses, I found myself on her towel, leaning towards her.

Jessica broke out into a fit of giggles. “You’re too kind Taengoo,” she said, patting my head. “It’s nothing like that; I meant it more like … sometimes, I can’t really understand the purpose of what I’m doing, but that’s only expected when you’re working for such a company,” she said, once again throwing me an apologetic smile.

As I retreated back onto my own towel, bumping into Tiffany’s hand suddenly reminded me of her presence.

I licked the back of my teeth, carefully sitting back down and trying to hide the immense embarrassment that was flooding my system like a warm torrent of water. Didn’t I resolve to be her good friend? Why was I just actively conversing in a way that excluded her? I was too ashamed of myself to bring myself to look at her. Even though she displayed such eagerness and kindness to me, the moment I had a reason to ignore her, I did. What kind of friend did that? If I resolved myself to be better than—

“Taeyeon, you’re beating yourself up too much.”

Tiffany’s arms snaked around my bare waist, her sing-song voice drifting into my ear, her breath brushing past the sensitive cartilage. A cold chill shot down my spine; I felt my ears burn up as she pressed her—herself against my back.

“Wha—what?”

It felt like that was the only thing I was capable of saying at the moment. Suddenly remembering that night from last week didn’t help my increasingly reddening face. In the back of my mind, however, I could hear the nagging voice repeating itself over and over: you don’t deserve this. You don’t deserve this.

“You looked really sad,” she explained, placing her head on my shoulder. I could feel her gaze locked onto me, the periodic puff of her breathing tickling my cheek.