it's her (but I wish it was you)

Today is the most joyful day of your life.

In just 4 hours you are going to be married to the love of your life, the whole ordeal was a sprint, a rush, borderline disaster. The catering cancelled last minute and another one accepted just three days before, the decorations had been delayed for so long you weren't sure they were going to arrive and the RSVP list was short until the last two weeks when suddenly everyone and their entire family wanted to come.

But, despite it all. You two had made it through, in all its collective glory. The wedding hall decked out in stunning arrays of baby pink veils, white lilies in ornate pale vases, the tables draped over in a similar shade of plain. It was exactly what you and Kahei wanted, sleek, modern and an embodiment of you two.

Now you were in the dressing room, trying to make yourself not look like a hurricane swept over you. You and your best woman, Jiwoo. She's always had the proper sense of fashion and that very brutal (although sweet) honesty to kick you in the balls when things weren't correct.

She was lounging in the plastic chair, wearing her own very stylish peach dress. Wearing it well, as per usual. "You look... like a bit of a mess, politely of course." Jiwoo said with a gentle laugh. As to soften the blow of her harsh remark. "Come here, let me sort you out. Can't embarrass yourself on your wedding now."

You lowered yourself to reach her leaned back embrace, letting her hands fiddle around with your red bow-tie. She straightened it into something actually presentable. "I don't know how you still can't wear your clothes... It's been how many years since you've met me?"

"Every time I try to dress you berate me." You grunted, letting her sort out your black blazer as well.

"Because you dress like a dead rat." Jiwoo stated, tucking your shirt in. "There you go, actually wearing your clothes instead of looking like you slept in them. Good stuff." Her hand sarcastically smacked your back in praise.

"Clearly the dead rat stuff was working for me up until this point." You gave rightful snark, looking at yourself in the mirror, damn you looked good. Jiwoo was a life saver.

"Kahei clearly just has low standards, did you talk to Chaewon? She wanted you to help her choose music. Your wife-to-be has truly terrible taste." That sounded like her, a spotify playlist that would even make an experimentalist cry from ear bleed.

"Yeah, don't worry I would never let her music play. I can't afford the paperwork for however many therapists we'd need."

"Don't think there would be enough in this city, the therapists would need a therapist. You should go quickly."

"Yep, thanks Jiwoo. Lifesaver."

"Of course, I'll be helping myself to double the food as rightful compensation."

You were already out the door, paying no mind to Jiwoo's words, you already bought 4x more than you would ever need. She could have it, even take more home if she wants. Rushing to Chaewon's corner, Jiwoo didn't tell you where she was but thankfully her location just happened to be on. Continuing this blitz of a day where if a second was wasted you'd feel the ramifications.

You knocked on the door where Chaewon (likely) was. Thankfully she answered, wearing mint green. The dress code for this entire day was quite simple, wear whatever colour you liked. Everyone looked in their element, a good choice from Kahei. She had her phone in her hand, eyes furrowed in visible disgruntlement.

"How is it going Chaewon?" You asked.

"Urgh! I've been going through every 'good wedding music playlist' and its all bad. Classical music is not the vibe for this wedding!" She shouted, your indicator to discreetly kick that door shut before the entire venue heard you.

"Yeah? What is the vibe of this wedding?" Your curiosity was piqued, sitting down on the chair adjacent to her. Everyone had put so much effort into this. It nearly bought a tear to your eye.

"I don't know! It's just, neither you or her are exactly the classy type– I think? Not to offend." Chaewon looked in distress, panicking more than you were. Putting her head to the table in disbelief.

"It's fine, you're right." You pondered for a second. "I'm thinking it could just be easier to play something from your playlist? Best taste out of all of us." You offered, Chaewon's always been the aux, to the point half of your playlist is just hers. Kahei and you bonded over that to begin with.

You remembered meeting her like yesterday, three years ago. You, Chaewon and a few random people you met online got together to go do some fucking competitive bowling which sounds stupid. But it was a fantastic time.

One of those people just so happened to be her of all people and you hit it off like dynamite. Perhaps for some reasons you wouldn't like to admit, but the two of you went on a date not a week later to a pizza parlor. So all in all it was humble beginnings.

"Really? Mine? I mean– what if the guests hate it?" Chaewon stuttered.

"You are worrying too much, 60% of the people who are turning up already listen to your music."

"Yeah? What about the 40-"

"Chaewon." You centered her gaze, putting your hands on her shoulders. "Calm Down." Her face scowled a bit but then started to recompose, stress flooding out of her system at last.

"Right, yeah. Sorry, I'll make a playlist full of my favourites. Thank you, for coming here. You always solve things so quickly." She let out a sigh of relief, adjusting her blonde hair that had swept up in her stress session.

"No problem Chaewon, relax... We still have–" You took a reflexive look at your watch. "3 hours 22 minutes... plenty of time."

"Yep! I'm going to get to work, I'm sure you are needed elsewhere." That you probably were, seemingly needing to be in eight places at once.

"I'll see you later, don't go too hard on yourself."

"I won't, bye!"

That was quick, dismissing yourself once more. There was at least one more task– double checking all the food. Make sure it's all neat, not on the floor, usual stuff.

You approached the countless tables of bought food, someone had beat you to it. One less things to deal with, good. You can relax, at least a little bit.

"It's you?" That voice.

Her.

Maybe you couldn't relax.

You turned around, there she was. Hyunjin, she looked different now, older. It's been so many years since you've seen her in the flesh, so many years since you've broken up, so many years since she left to pursue her dreams.

An entire kaleidoscope of emotions hit you at once. Sadness, joy, confusion, regret and relief. She looked so good in that yellow dress, covering her body in her favourite colour.

You've only just realised how long you've stood there in silence. Staring at her.

"Hyunjin?" Your voice was meek, shocked, taking a step closer.

"Hey..." She was not fairing any better, looking down to the left of you, not willing to make eye contact. Hyunjin's hand was nervously stroking her arm.

"Why are you here?"

"I was invited, happened to be in the country for a few months. Plus one for Yena. Kahei's friend, I don't know if you know her." Yena, Yena, the name rang a faint bell in your mind. You didn't know her that well, friend of a friend at best. Funny how fate works.

"I see, well–"

"Can we talk?" Hyunjin cut you off despite her timidness. "Privately, please."

"Of course." You wanted to talk more than anything in this current moment, to finally reunite with your friend after so many years. You racked your brain, Jiwoo likely had left to check on Kahei, your best bet by far. "Follow."

The two of you quickly sprinted, for as well as she could in heels. Opening the door before Hyunjin was in frame, it was empty. Thankfully. "Alright, here will do." You ushered her in, closing the door behind with a soft click. No distractions, just the two of you.

The room was tense, throbbing with the strongest, purest emotion. Hyunjin sat down, so did you. Neither one wanting to be the one that shattered the silence. You two still couldn't look each other in the eyes, the seconds passed, nothing. Your heart raced, struggling to breathe, you haven't felt like this since before you broke up.

You couldn't' take it anymore, the atmosphere was crushing you alive, one more second and you'd implode. "So, how's it been...? since yknow."