[28] At The Center Of Regrets

April 16, 2023, 8:11am, En Route to Ryujin's Hideout, Daegu, South Korea.

As the team plodded along towards the ITZY member's place, Ryujin giddily asked Jihyo what happened to her during these past few months. Jihyo replied by telling her how she got here-- from losing Mina to the Koul'ins, to meeting Zeke, to having a settlement, to having their Manifests.

For the first time in four months... Ryujin was happy that she now had someone else to talk to. To listen to. It was a warm feeling, one that she had been lacking for quite some time.

As Jihyo continued talking to her, Ryujin notices that they're close to her place.

"Oh, wait, Jihyo-unnie, Zeke, Hyungwon, Hangyeol... before we continue, I want to tell you all that my place isn't what you're used to seeing..." Ryujin said. "As an idol I know I should be maintaining my place, but right now, it's all crooked and messy. I hope that's alright."

"I'm pretty sure we are okay with it." Zeke smiled. "Now, come on. I think we have to hurry, my friend here is freezing."

He then points to Hangyeol who was shivering to death.

"Y-you could've just made me a rocket seal...y'know?!" Hangyeol said.

"Sorry, Hyungwon told me to not lend you one again. He looked serious and frankly, I don't really wanna be on his angry side, so..." Zeke said as he scratched his head.

"If it was about earlier, just g-get over it, Hyungwon! It was just a joke!" Hangyeol replied.

"Just returning the favor, Hangyeol, it's funny seeing you like that," Hyungwon smirked as they chuckled.

They soon arrive at Ryujin's place, not too far from the place they were just in.

It was an abandoned chicken restaurant. Massive piles of debris scattered around the area and traces of decimated snowmen lie buried on the snowy floor.

Ryujin opens up a large hatch behind the counter, showing a stairway that leads to an underground stockroom.

"Right this way, lady and gentlemen." Ryujin smiles.

They all went down, and they see Ryujin's place... A place which she has called home for several months.

"Soooo... Welcome to my small home. It's not much, but hey, it's all pretty good to me." Ryujin smiled as they all looked at her place.

It was surprisingly warm, and the place felt relaxing. Ryujin has turned a steel cabinet into a makeshift bed with a mattress on it, and she dismantled all the other metal stalls and turned them into desks, chairs, and tables.

On one of the tables lay a few pencils, some empty antidote canisters, a few small bags of chips, and her phone, that was flashing a Frank Sinatra playlist on its small screen.

On the walls were some taped pictures of her with Yuna, Yeji, Chaeryoung, and Lia. A couple of drawings were there as well, seemingly drawn by Ryujin herself.

Lots of papers are on the floor, and it was a bit messy. But the place was impressive enough for a makeshift home.

"This place... you fixed it all by yourself?" Zeke asked.

"Yep." Ryujin nods as she presses a button on her armor, and it removes on it's own. "Took a while to figure things out but eventually I did. Just had to place my mind into it, like what I've been doing as an idol for years now..." Ryujin then carries the armor and places it on top of the table. She then offers everyone a seat.

"This place is nice and all but... how did you end up here?" Jihyo asked as she sat down on one of the makeshift chairs.

"Hmm... I was here in Daegu because of a photo shoot. Nothing much going on, same ol' job. But this whole stuff happened and the next thing I know, I was on the run. Then I found this place and hid here for a while. The food here kept me alive, but it was scarce, so I was forced to eat raw stuff. It's lucky I never got salmonella. I think it's because of the cold. Either that or I just have a really strong stomach. Must've been from all that spicy food I've been eating all my life...

"And then?" Jihyo asked.

"I stayed here for... what? 4 months tops. I don't go out often, and when I do, I try to make sure I haul as many supplies as I can."

"You didn't... try to get out and get back to Seoul?" Jihyo said.

"I tried. But it was so difficult. Every so often, heavily guarded alien vehicles arrive, bringing in supplies and all toward the park. So... you know, me being only human... I was forced to stay here."

They just listened to her story.

"And then one day... I had this crazy idea to steal some alien supplies. It was a lot of planning. I ambushed Koul'ins for their supplies and put them down. There were instances that I nearly got killed.. but hey, in the end... I got myself some pretty good loot, don't you think? Hehe." Ryujin grinned.

"These are amazing, though," Hyungwon said as he fiddled around with her armor. "I could tinker with this all day... O-of course, with your permission, Miss Ryujin."

"Oh, are you some sort of mechanic, Hyungwon?" Ryujin asked.

"Y-yes," Hyungwon replied. "I've been tinkering with similar things for months now."

"His efforts as a mechanic have helped us for a while now! He's totally reliable." Jihyo added as she smiled.

"Perfect timing! I'll need your help with this. I don't think I have unlocked this armor's full potential so, if it's okay..." Ryujin said.

"Of course, definitely. Anything to help..." Hyungwon said as he blushed. He sees Hangyeol grinning like an idiot, seemingly teasing him again.

"Once we get back to the settlement, you're mincemeat, Hangyeol," Hyungwon said to himself.

"It's... actually surprising that you've managed to do all of these," Jihyo said.

"When you're in a scary alien apocalypse, Jihyo-unnie, you'd do anything to survive," Ryujin replied. "I'm surprised myself that I have lived this long on my own, and never in my whole life have I thought of wielding and using alien equipment like this... But then again, I'm no stranger to sudden twists in my life..."

"I agree... One moment, we're idols, now... we are... different. A lot different." Jihyo said as she nodded.

"Hehe. Sometimes life gives you lemons, and you try to make lemonade, but weirdly enough, orange juice comes out." Ryujin said.

"That... doesn't make any sense..." Zeke said, scratching his head.

"Yeah, exactly. Because life, in general, doesn't make sense, Zeke. Hehe." Ryujin replied. "So... going back to our discussion earlier... I've wanted to ask what are you doing here, Jihyo-unnie."

"We are trying to investigate this place because Sana is in here, taken captive by the Koul'in..."

Ryujin's eyes widen. "Sana-unnie? Here?"

"Mhm... We were hoping to get some information regarding directions on this place, but it's too foggy, and we might run into those damned aliens." Jihyo replied.

"I have the intel you need!" Ryujin said.

"Really?" Jihyo replied.

"Yeah! I've actually been inside, but that was a month ago. I still remember the twists and turns of it. Why don't we go and save her right now?" Ryujin said. "We're prepared, and you have your Manifests. I'll help!"

"...we can't. It's too risky," Jihyo said as she took a deep breath. "Sure... I loving risking, and we have Manifests to get into it... but... my settlement leader was right. If we go there like this right now without a plan... There's a high chance we might die. And a dead Jihyo can't save Sana. So we plan to head back. I would pretty much love it if you come with us." Jihyo said.

"..." Ryujin fell silent and she looks down.

"What's wrong...?" Jihyo asked.

"I don't... know. I'm glad I'm able to see you again... but I don't think I could join you on the way back. I'm not used to seeing a lot of people anymore, and I prefer this setup." Ryujin said as she took a water bottle from the counter and drank it.

"Why?" Jihyo asked.

"It's weird to say this, Jihyo-unnie... But I've grown attached to this place. It's not the best, of course, and our dorm is way, way better. But... I don't know. I feel like it's some sort of home. It made me realize a lot of things."

"Like what?" Jihyo asked.

"That I shouldn't take things for granted," Ryujin replied. "Whenever I go out for supplies... I take the time to look around. All of the things I see outside right now... Can you believe those were once lovely buildings... sights... places filled with people, peace, and laughter? And I completely ignored that. I was so busy with my idol life in the past year that I forgot to enjoy the little things. And now it's all gone. Everyone is gone. And this is all I have left."

"So... you stayed here because you think this is the only place left that reminds you of that once lovely time," Jihyo said.

Ryujin nods.

"I mean, you felt it too, right? This place... doesn't look the same as the outside. It feels like home!" Ryujin smiles as she stands up and points at her stuff. "See.. look. I have pictures of my friends, some speakers to listen to music... a really ragged bed... and I even have a place to dance whenever I feel like dancing. Can you believe there's a toilet here too? It feels... really like home."

"But Ryujin.... it's not home. This isn't home. It's just... confinement." Zeke said.

Ryujin falls silent and looks at Zeke.

"Wh-what do you mean, Zeke..?" Ryujin said.

"You're confining yourself to what it seems to be like home. But you know it isn't. Just because it reminds you of a homely place doesn't mean you're supposed to call it home, Ryujin. You're punishing yourself by trying to relive the moments you missed while you're busy back then... and now you're trying to bring it back. It's... unhealthy." Zeke added.

Ryujin frowns and looks down.

"Zeke, maybe you shouldn't have said that..." Jihyo said.

"Right, right. I..I'm sorry." Zeke looks away. "It's inappropriate for me to give unsolicited advice at this time and I--"

"No. Zeke. You saw right through me immediately... You're right... I am punishing myself." Ryujin said as she covered her face with her hands.

Hangyeol, Hyungwon, and Jihyo's eyes widen.

"I kept telling myself that if I stay here, I'd be able to relive those moments. Added to the fact that I can do it without judgment... Without the cameras... I am basically unstoppable. But at the end of the day, it's all hypocrisy. I know... things aren't normal anymore. And I hope we go back to those times, but we can't. I can't... and I miss it. I miss it all..."

Jihyo scoots closer to Ryujin and rubs her back.

"I feel the same, Ryujin. I miss performing on stage. I miss singing and dancing. I miss the wild roars of our ONCEs, or how I'm able to consistently annoy Jeongyeon while just playing games in our dorm. I'm sure Hangyeol, Hyungwon, and Zeke also feel the same with their lives."

Ryujin removes her hands from her face and looks at Jihyo, who was still rubbing her back.

"Yeah...?" Ryujin said.

"Mhm. Yeah. We all want that normalcy to return so we can savor every moment of it once again, but we can't do that if we are stagnant in one place, right? Sooner or later, we'll have to move and try to make a difference in this trying time."

Jihyo takes a deep breath and now combs Ryujin's hair.

"And you can't make a difference if you stay here and feed on your regrets." Jihyo added.

Ryujin just contemplated on what Jihyo said to her.

For months, she has been staying here because it felt homely. Or at least, she believes it so.

No one was there to tell her what is right or wrong in this catastrophe... so she safely assumed that staying here was the only way to get on with her life. She knew it wasn't the best idea, but she couldn't do anything about it. The forces outside her so-called home is unforgivingly cold, deadly, and dark, what could a single human do? She would only get killed.

It was even a stroke of luck that she had managed to steal some alien technology. In fact, her overall survival was a miracle.

But now, she didn't have to bear with this feeling alone any longer. Especially now that Jihyo and her friends were there by her side.

And Ryujin knew that they wouldn't leave this place without her.

"...Spicy food." Ryujin suddenly muttered as she looked at everyone.

"Eh..?" Jihyo looked at her.

"Your settlement... Does it have spicy food?" Ryujin asked.

"Yes, we do. Ask Diarrhea Man over here. He knows where the best spicy food is in our place." Hyungwon said as he points at Hangyeol.

"Hey! You know, you've been making way too many clapbacks over a single joke I made." Hangyeol frowned.

Ryujin chuckles as she stands. "Alright then. In that case... I'll be joining you guys."

Jihyo smiled.

"I'll just need to gather a few things before I finally go," Ryujin added as she inhaled. "I am sure going to miss this place..."

"Your new place on our settlement is going to be much, much better. And probably resemble a lot more like home than this." Jihyo replied as she smiled. "We'll help with the packing, too."

The group proceeds to pack her stuff in a few, small bags--- Her clothes, tools, and other essentials she may need.

As they continue to clear the place out, Ryujin removes a picture of her with her friends off the wall. She takes a good look at it.

It was a picture from their "NOT SHY" music video, and they look so cute and happy.

"I wonder how the four of them are back in Seoul..." Ryujin thought to herself. "If the apocalypse reached there... are they okay? what did they do to survive? Would they have done the same thing I did? I wonder..."

"Ryujin, are you done?" Zeke asked. "We are just waiting for you."

"Y-yes," Ryujin said as she places the photos in her pocket. "Just need to don my trusty stolen armor and we are good to go."

She wears her exoskeletal armor, and it was similar to wearing a t-shirt and a pair of jeans. She presses the button on the side, and the icy armor flattens around her body, expelling cold gas around it as it deflates.
She then wears her bracers next, which contain small pumps similar to a hydraulic press. It locks in place with her armor. Lastly, she wears her seemingly heavy boots as the whole armor finally glows.

"God... it takes a while to wear these, sorry," Ryujin said.

"A quick question..." Hangyeol asks. "What does your armor actually do?"

"Well... hmm.. as far as I know... it makes me stronger and more durable. Like a lot. I think these pumps on my arms help me lift bigger stuff? Never tried it myself. Oh, and I can temporarily fly using these boots. God knows how many times I've accidentally activated this and hit my head on the ceiling..." She chuckles as she wears her helmet.

"So I'm finally set, y'all. Let's go." Ryujin smiles as she looks at her place one last time, and within a few minutes, they were outside once again.

April 16, 2023, 11:00am, Outskirts of E-World Amusement Park, Daegu, South Korea.

As they got out of the chicken restaurant, they hear some heavy scuttling nearby.

"Oh no," Ryujin said.

"W-what do you mean... "Oh no"..?" Hangyeol said.

"What time is it?" Ryujin asks. Hyungwon checks the time.

"Exactly 11 in the morning. Why?" He replies.

"Oh no oh no oh no! We have to get out of---"

Suddenly, a giant monstrosity lands just next to them, seemingly coming from above.

It looked like a giant, glowing stag beetle the size of a garbage truck, with a small face of a Scraper on its head, seemingly spewing out green saliva from its mouth. It had a tough, steel-like carapace, with glowing streaks seemingly made of transparent fiberglass. It had snow-compacted humanoid arms and legs, and it was on all fours. It also had jagged pincers that glow with icy power as it began snapping them, signifying that it's ready for battle.

"What in the world..?" Hyungwon remarked as he backed.

"Eek..! It's a giant bug-scraper thing! it's disgusting...!" Hagyeol exclaimed in fear. "How did you know it's here at this exact time?!"

"I've been here a while... every time a caravan of alien supplies passes toward the park, this giant asshat arrives hours later at this exact time to make sure no one has followed the caravan and attacks without hesitation!"

"So it's a giant... beetle Scraper, huh... Stand back, you all. Don't worry. I'll handle it..." Jihyo said as she walks toward the enemy, displaying her powerful Manifest as it turns into a katana.

The beetle-like Scraper was looking at Jihyo.

"....I can handle it... I can handle it..." Jihyo said to herself. Zeke sees Jihyo visibly shuddering. And it wasn't out of the cold. It was fear.

Because Jihyo isn't really a fan of bugs.

"Come on...! I'll take you on!" Jihyo charges towards the monstrous bug hybrid as it screeches. Her Manifest glows as she slashes one of its arms with extreme agility. The giant beetle Scraper backs, letting out a pained screech.

"Whew... It took a lot in me to make that strike... Looks like I can do this... I just hope it doesn't have the ability to fly..." Jihyo thought.

The bug screeches again, its armored back slowly opening. It then unleashes its transparent icy wings as it slowly floats above the ground.

Jihyo's face immediately showed a mix of surprise, disgust, and fear.

"YAAAAAAA! IT DOES FLY!" Jihyo suddenly yelled in disgust as she immediately made a run behind Zeke, holding him by the shoulders as she shuddered in fear.

"Z-Zeke the damn thing can fly...! Huhuhuhu!" Jihyo said, teary-eyed.

"It's just a large Scraper bug, we've dealt with worse!" Zeke replied.

"NONONONO! It's still a bug! And there's nothing worse than a giant flying bug!" Jihyo whines. "Huhu... Zeke, please, take over... Kill it with fire!"

This is the first time Zeke has seen Jihyo react like this. Sure, it was because of a giant Beetle Scraper, but he felt something else.

The way that Jihyo immediately ran to him for cover is a sign of her growing closeness to him. Surprising and cute, he has to admit, but in this situation... it's a slight disadvantage.

Ryujin has never seen her senior freak out so bad like this, too. But she can't blame her, though. They were facing a giant, flying bug, after all. And who knows what other monsters are lurking in this fog? The thought of it can make anyone shudder.

"Jihyo-unnie is kinda cute when she's scared..." Ryujin smiles a bit.

"Okay, okay. Looks like I'll have to deal with this huge bug..." Zeke sighed as he prepares his Manifest. It glows as the huge scissor burns into a fiery switchblade.

"Mind if I join the fun, Zeke?" Ryujin said, readying her guns. "I wanna release some tension, and my trigger fingers are starting to get really, really ITZY."