Yuqi's Boy Toy's Ball Toy

"God I hate big dicks!"

"I hope you haven't looked in the mirror recently then," you reply, matching Yuqi's snark with yours as she comes barging into your apartment.

"Fuck you." She helps herself to a beer in your fridge.

"Can I help you with something?"

"Yes, teach guys that wanting to smash is figurative, not literal."

"I'll send out a meeting invite, anything else?"

"No, I just came to steal your beer."

"And I get nothing out of it today?"

"Blame my one night stand last night. If you wanted some you should've answered yesterday."

"I know a drunk booty call when I see one, I'm surprised he got anything done with you."

"Well he definitely did, ugh it's still sore." You sigh and give in.

"There's an ice pack in the freezer and hot packs on the shelf, use whichever you think helps."

"Mwah, you're the best." Yuqi pecks you in thanks. She grabs a hot pack and flops onto the couch, placing it over her abdomen. "Ooh that's good. All you need is some pads, condoms, and plan B, and I'm never leaving this place." 

"I am not your personal pharmacy. How long are you going to be here?"

"Why? Somewhere you have to be, or someone coming over that you have to be in? Spill it!"

"No, I have errands to run, and I don't need you bringing bad fuck number 2 here."

"I won't, I'll just be on your computer going through your search history."

"You're not staying here while I'm out, you can either come with me to the supermarket, or you can leave when I leave and come back later."

"Will you text me when you come back dear?" Yuqi simpers.

"No."

"Fine, guess I'm coming with you then."

You regret your decision, as by the end of the shopping trip, you've bought more for Yuqi than for yourself.

"Thank you so very much," she says as she places her snacks on the shelf.

"You're welcome, daily interest rate is 50%."

"For?"