istillfeelthesame

The air inside the house was thick with the scent of cheap cologne and the booming bass of a playlist Kaede has spent weeks perfecting. YN felt his social battery hitting the red zone, the constant introductions wearing him thin.

Needing a sanctuary, he slipped through the sliding glass doors. The transition to the stillness of the backyard was a physical relief. He took a step toward the lawn, but his breath caught in his throat.

There, leaning against the wooden fence, was a girl entirely disconnected from the noise inside. She was tilted back, her gaze immersed in the stars as if reading a secret written in the constellations. At that moment, YN’s heart started burning up with a sudden, localized heat.

“Hi. Anna, right?“ YN asked, recalling Kaede’s rapid fire introductions from earlier.

She nodded slowly shifting her weight to face him fully. “YN?“ her tone was unsure but melodic.

“The one and only.“ he joked quietly, stepping closer to the fence but keeping a respectful distance. “I take it you’re also a refugee from Kaede’s ‘Party of the Century‘? “

Anna let out a soft, airy laugh that seemed to harmonize with the crickets. “Is it that obvious? I love her, but i think I’ve been introduced to three different people named ‘Haru‘ in the last twenty minutes. My brains full.“

​"Only three?" YN leaned his elbows on the railing, looking up at the sky she had been admiring. "I think I met a fourth one near the snack table. He was very enthusiastic about the dip."

​"See? Exactly why I’m out here," she said, her smile widening. She gestured to the sprawling darkness above. "It’s better out here anyway. No neon lights, no bass shaking your teeth. Just... this. Do you know any of them?"

​"The stars? Not really," YN admitted. "I'm a tech student. I'm better at navigating file directories than constellations. I usually just look for the brightest one and hope it’s not a satellite."

​Anna hummed, a thoughtful sound. "My grandfather used to tell me that if you look long enough, the patterns start to make sense. Like a map. I don't know the formal names either, but I like making up my own. That cluster over there?" She pointed toward a jagged line of stars. "That’s 'The Broken Umbrella'."

​YN squinted, following her finger. "I see it. And that one next to it? Looks like a lopsided motherboard."

​She laughed again, a sound that made the heat in his chest flare up again. "Spoken like a true IT major. I think we're looking at two very different versions of the same sky, YN."

​They spent the next hour like that, tucked away in the shadows of the porch while the muffled thumping of the party continued behind them. They talked about things that didn't require a resume—how Kaede was the only person who could convince them to attend a party this loud, their shared disdain for 8:00 AM lectures, and the strange, quiet pressure of being a student in a city that never seemed to stop moving.

​By the time the sliding door creaked open and a tipsy guest stumbled out, breaking the spell, YN felt like the girl in front of him wasn't just another name on Kaede's guest list.

​"I should probably go find my coat before someone spills punch on it," Anna said, though she didn't move immediately. She looked at him, her eyes bright in the dim light. "Thanks for the company, YN. It made the 'Party of the Century' actually bearable."

​"Anytime, Anna. I'll keep an eye out for 'The Broken Umbrella' on my walk home.”

After that night, it’s like a hidden character was unlocked and appeared in his world. Suddenly, the crowded campus felt smaller. YN began to spot her everywhere—the flash of her hair in a hallway, the window seat in the cafeteria, or her silhouette in the back of the library.

​They exchanged small, knowing waves and smiles that lingered just a second too long. It was a secret language built in the spaces between classes.

​Then came the weight of exam season. The library was a graveyard of coffee cups and highlighters. They sat across from each other at a wide oak table. Kaede and their friends had been there earlier, pleading for help with YN’s IT modules and Anna’s theories, but as midnight approached, they had all tapped out.

​YN tried to focus on his code, but he found himself multitasking. He was studying her habits like a secret project: the way her brows creased when she hit a difficult passage, the rhythmic click-click-click of her pen, and the long breath she took before flipping a page.

​He thought he was being subtle, but Anna didn't even look up from her notes when she spoke.

​"Am I that pretty that I keep distracting you from your study?" she teased, her voice a whisper that echoed in the empty hall.

​YN felt the heat climb to the tips of his ears. He let out a dry, sheepish laugh and partially closed his laptop.

​"Maybe. Or maybe I'm just analyzing the structural integrity of your pen-clicking technique," he countered.

​Anna finally looked up, resting her chin on her palm, her gaze locked onto his. "Liar," she whispered, leaning in closer. "You haven't clicked on your keyboard for ten minutes. If you wanted a better view, YN, you could have just asked.”

YN leaned back, his chair creaking softly in the otherwise silent library. He met her gaze, deciding to lean into the friction rather than retreat.

​"Okay, fine. I’m caught," he admitted, his voice dropping to a playful, conspiratorial hush. "But in my defense, you’re making it very hard to focus on studying when you’re doing that thing with your hair every five minutes."

​Anna raised a perfectly groomed eyebrow, a challenge in her eyes. "Doing what?"

​"The thing where you tuck it behind your ear, realize it didn’t stay, and then huff like it’s the most personal insult you’ve ever endured," he teased. "It’s very dramatic. Highly distracting."

​Anna let out a soft, stifled giggle, the sound bouncing off the stacks of books surrounding them. She reached out, playfully tapping the lid of his laptop. "Maybe you’re just looking for an excuse to fail your finals. Don't blame my hair for your lack of willpower, YN."

​"Willpower is a finite resource, Anna. And mine is currently tied up in trying to understand why this script won't run," he sighed, finally closing the laptop fully. He pushed it aside, resting his chin on his crossed arms. "What about you? You’ve been staring at that Sociology text for three hours, but I’ve noticed you haven’t highlighted a single word in twenty minutes."

​Anna’s playful expression flickered, softening into something more grounded. She looked down at the book, her thumb tracing the edge of the pages. The flirtatious energy in the air didn't vanish, but it shifted into something more intimate—the kind of conversation that only happens after midnight.

​"I’m just thinking," she said quietly. "About how much of this actually matters for where I’m going."

​YN tilted his head. "Where are you going? I figured you were heading for a law firm or some high-end corporate office with the way you handle those debate modules."

​Anna shook her head, a small, tentative smile forming. "Not exactly. I actually... I got a call yesterday. A small agency in Seoul. They saw the portfolio I did for that student film project last semester."

​YN felt a slight pang in his chest, a premonition he couldn't quite name. "A modeling agency?"

​"Yeah," she breathed, her eyes lighting up with a mix of excitement and terror. "I’ve already taken a few small offers—local lookbooks, some digital ads. But this is bigger. They want me to come for a screen test after finals. It’s what I’ve always wanted, YN. The clothes, the travel, the storytelling without words... but it’s a completely different world than this."

​She gestured to the dusty library and the scattered notes. YN looked at her, truly looking at her, and realized that she was already halfway out the door. Her path was headed for runways and camera flashes, while his was rooted in logic, cables, and the quiet stability of a desk in a tech hub.

​"You'd be amazing at it," he said, and he meant it. "You already have the 'editorial glare' down to a science."

​Anna laughed, but it was bittersweet. "And what about you? The big Lead Systems Analyst dream?"

​"Stable. Predictable. Safe," YN replied, though the words felt a little heavier than they had an hour ago. "I'll be the guy making sure the systems don't crash while the rest of the world—people like you—are out there making it look beautiful."

​Anna reached across the table, her fingers briefly grazing the back of his hand. It was a fleeting touch, but it felt like a promise and a goodbye all at once. "The systems need to be strong for the beauty to matter, YN."

​They sat there for a long time after that, the flirting replaced by a heavy, quiet understanding. The stars they had looked at in the backyard were still there, but they were finally starting to realize they were orbiting two very different suns.

"Five minutes remaining," the proctor in the Engineering wing announced.

Across the quad, in the Liberal Arts building, a different proctor was likely saying the exact same thing.

Y/N scribbled a final line of code, checked his student ID number one last time, and leaned back just as the "Pens down" order echoed through the hall. He gathered his things and pushed through the heavy double doors, his brain feeling like a hard drive that had been wiped clean.