Too Soon?

It had been days since Jimin was aware of Minjeong’s Twitter profile. Luckily her friends weren’t pushing her to check it out like they did the moment they found it and to her surprise none of her dumb friends had done any snooping.

Maybe they wanted to leave the discoveries for her. Which was odd because Chaeyoung and Aeri wouldn’t pass on such an opportunity. Or maybe they already stalked Minjeong’s profile and were just waiting for Jimin to check it out herself.

She knew very well that Tzuyu could also do it but only if she cared enough, and most of the time, she didn't. But this didn't really fell into that category. Finding the profile was good enough for her to contribute to the shenanigans.

Jimin found herself awake, in the middle of the night, staring at the screen of her phone because she couldn't decide if she wanted to let her curiosity take the best of her, drown herself in cat videos or just ultimately turn her phone off and try to fall asleep.

All of this would have been so much easier if Minjeong was an arrogant, dull woman or all of the things that could make Jimin unattracted to her. But alas, Minjeong was everything but arrogant, dull and a bitch.

Minjeong was kind, she always responded with a smile, she loved animals, and she was smart. Not to mention that she was the girl from Jimin’s dreams that made her way to Jimin’s heart before actually meeting each other in person.

Jimin made a mental note that Minjeong had the prettiest smile she had ever seen on this planet and seeing it outside of her dreams was too much for her.

It was maddening, really. Because these types of things should only happen in… well, dreams. Or in fiction. It was hard to believe that a person could conjure up someone so ideal in their dreams and then meet them in real life. Not to mention, feel the same things.

Jimin didn't understand how she felt, if she was being completely honest with herself. Because she knew how she felt towards the Minjeong in her dreams, which was strong, honest and uncontrollable. She was vulnerable.

Whereas being with Minjeong in real life, made her cautious. She wasn’t sure how much longer she could control herself without blurting something as weird as ‘I think I have intimate feelings for you because you appear in my dreams’.

So, in order for Jimin to act like a normal human being to her neighbor that recently became her acquaintance and now laundry buddy, she had to keep everything at bay.

Maybe she needed to distract herself.

Jimin tapped her thumb on the phone and the dim light of her screen came to life again, looking at her homepage and fighting the urge to click the magnifying glass at the bottom left.

It could be the drowsiness that made her absentmindedly click on it and then thumbed over the handle that Tzuyu told her when her friend discovered it.

She blinked; she probably wasn’t thinking straight. Because she was suddenly staring at Minjeong’s page, her profile picture was of her with long hair that reached her back, the cover photo was filled with cartoon puppies and the bio of her profile said that she indeed loved dogs and books.

Maybe Minjeong enjoyed fictional books before being nose deep into Law related ones, since Jimin knew that Minjeong was studying law at the moment.

Her curiosity was taking the best out of her rational mind. She read the first few tweets Minjeong posted but felt a bit off reading them and wondered what her neighbor’s mood was when she did. So instead, she immediately went to the Media tab and scrolled through Minjeong’s photos.

Jimin was careful not to press the like button or anything that would notify Minjeong that she was stalking. Then again, Jimin was on her private account, but she would rather still be cautious.

She caught herself smiling like an idiot while going through these photos. Minjeong posted a couple of photos of herself at the grooming salon, some where she assumed it was her mother because the resemblance of her neighbor and the older woman right next to her was uncanny. There were some pictures from Animal Crossing and Minjeong’s captions were so adorable.

It felt like many minutes had passed as Jimin was scrolling and gushing at how adorable the photos were posted. Jimin couldn’t stop smiling at how Minjeong looked, her pretty eyes as they disappear in the pictures she was tagged in, her puffy cheeks and the cute poses she was doing.

But when she felt like she scrolled through too much, she decided to exit, and when she accidentally went back into Minjeong’s main page, she felt her heart beating slower when she saw the most recent post Minjeong was tagged to.

Lee Jeno @leejen_o_423
@imwinter out with this girl. Love her so much. :)

And without a doubt, there was a picture of Minjeong smiling at the camera and her reply was at the bottom, two blushing emojis were there.

Jimin immediately deleted Minjeong’s profile from her search history, went back into her Twitter feed, refreshed it many times and threw her phone at the side.

“Good thing I didn’t invest,” she whispered to herself, covering her eyes with her forearm and sighed.

Of course, she had a boyfriend. There was no way in hell that a smart, lovely woman like Minjeong would be single. Jimin didn’t have the courage to stalk the boyfriend’s profile to really confirm if they were dating or not. The words ‘love her so much’ were enough to prove everything to her.

“Yes, Jimin, internet stalking is bad. Yes, I’m aware it’ll also lead to me getting hurt over something that is nonexistent,” she internally scolded herself. If she was able to look at the mirror or another copy of herself, she would roll her eyes at how foolish this all was.

But then again, even if Jimin did have the courage to make a move, there was no point because she knew she still wouldn’t. Given that she already told herself several times that she wasn’t going to do anything about it. She had feelings, that was one fact. But for her to even do something about it was beyond her mental and emotional capacity.

They could always stay as neighbors, they could be friends, she could mind her own business because there was nothing else she could get from that alone. Minjeong was fun to be around, and she enjoyed her company. Jimin wasn’t going to deny that there was something inside her that felt something for her neighbor, but she also thought it was ridiculous because she only gained these feelings through a dream. Several of them up to date.

She thought about it again deeply. Jimin knew that if they kept talking, if they kept hanging out, she was bound to have actual feelings for the actual Minjeong in real life and not the one in her dream. Maybe she needed to avoid it, let her small crush fade away so that she could be a functional human being towards the girl. But maybe Jimin was also getting ahead of herself. It was not like she was going to be a bumbling mess when she was face to face with Minjeong again after tonight.

Jimin sat up on her bed, grabbed her phone again and searched for a solemn song to play to help amplify her emotions at that moment. Her thoughts were a mess, and she didn’t know what else to do.

There was a knock on her door but before she could get up, she could hear Chaeyoung scoff from behind it. “Stop playing sad boy music!”

“Eat shit, you don’t know my pain!”

“Jokes on you, I don’t really give a shit!”

“Go to sleep, Chaeyoung!”

“Stop playing music and go to bed then!”

Jimin grabbed her keys from the bowl and checked herself one last time before heading out the door. It had been days since she saw the post from Minjeong’s boyfriend and yes, she did tell her friends about it and of course, they didn't really care about it.

Chaeyoung kept reasoning that it was just a boyfriend and that maybe they would break up soon and Jimin immediately smacked her on the head for even thinking about something like that. She just wanted to be saddened by the fact that Minjeong was taken, it was not like she wanted the universe to be on her side and make Minjeong available just for her.

She wasn’t that type of person. Of course, she wanted what was best for other people, even if she wasn’t in the picture.

Aeri told her that it was fine, because either way, she still gained a friend and that she and Minjeong were good at that as well. But Jimin didn’t have the courage to really tell her how she felt and that she was struggling with whatever she had inside of her heart because Minjeong was still invading her dreams and messing up with everything she was feeling.

Avoiding Minjeong was probably the best thing she could do. Jimin didn’t know what to say to her, she also didn’t know how to deal with her emotions so being around her neighbor was probably a bad idea. Because Jimin wasn’t the type to hide whatever she was feeling.

She stepped out of her apartment, locked the door and once it was secure, she walked towards the elevator. As she pressed the button for it to go down, she heard another door close.

“Jimin! Hold the elevator!”

Fuck. It was Minjeong.

The short haired girl jogged towards the elevator and stopped a couple of feet away from Jimin. Even at a decent amount of distance, Minjeong’s perfume invaded her senses and Jimin wanted to fold and lean towards her. She gently shook her head. That was another invasive and very creepy thought, so she composed herself and smiled weakly at the girl.

“I think I’m late for work,” Minjeong muttered as they both watched the small screen on the elevator reach their floor.

Jimin hummed, not bothering to look at her, “I’m sure you’ll make it.” Her response sounded even more bland than Chaeyoung’s homemade congee.

The elevator doors opened and Jimin waited for Minjeong to step in first before she did and when the doors closed, Jimin pressed the button for the ground floor and again, they were shrouded in silence.

Minjeong was bouncing awkwardly on her heels and glanced at Jimin. “You think you’ll have a busy day today?”

She shrugged. “Probably.”