Spaghettification

Lighting the cigarette in your hand, you lift it up to your trembling lips, take a drag, and watch as the smoke billows out of your mouth. The mid-afternoon sun is intense, blinding, and frustrating all at once, but when you remember why you’re visiting a cliffside cafe at four in the afternoon, you let all that stress melt away.

You’re here for her.

Narrowly avoiding two teens arguing over something petty, you step inside Cafe Oblivion. The scent of freshly brewed coffee, baked pretzels, and a hint of their finest carrot cake overtakes your nostrils. It only takes one scan of the room to know where she is.

There, by the open-air area, seated with her back to the door, is her.

Before you can make it too far into the cafe, a member of staff warns you that this is a no-smoking establishment. You apologize with a quick bow as you escape the confrontation to jog up to her seat.

But you freeze.

She hasn’t turned around yet, but you’re already at a loss for words. How could you not? She’s your girlfriend. And she’s beautiful.

Staring at the view beyond the balcony, cup of coffee in hand, she watches the children playing at the park in the distance, the coming and going of the vehicles on the street below, and the occasional birds flying into the horizon. You can tell she’s waiting for the sunset that isn’t due for at least two more hours. You can tell because you know she never misses the view—every single day.

You know this because that’s how your girlfriend is—Naoi Rei.

“Is this seat taken?” are the first words your scatterbrained self can procure as you still try to process what you’re looking at—who you’re looking at—right now. The moment she hears your voice, she turns around immediately and gasps. “You … Oppa, what are you doing here? I—.”

You don’t care. You rush in for the embrace.

Wincing a bit from the sudden crushing hug, when you ease up on her, Rei’s chuckling into the crook of your neck, patting your head gently as if you were a baby. “Ya, I told you not to worry about me. I’m just meeting Jiwon here. She’s a bit late though. Thought she—.”

Sitting next to her, when you hold her hand, Rei gives you a look. “Is something wrong?”

You can’t hide it from her, can you? You couldn’t hide a thing from her at all. “I … Rei, there’s …”

You can’t tell her, can you? You don’t have it in you to do so. You don’t know how she might react. What she might say. What she might do to you. The words won’t come out. They congeal at the back of your throat, stifling your voice. “I-I … “

You don’t know how much time you have left. You don’t know the specifics, but it’s going to happen any minute now. It’s now or never. “Rei, I need to tell you something crazy, but … please—please listen to me … Please believe me.”

Rei tilts her her head to the side, setting down her coffee. She crinkles her nose, and for a moment, you catch the small pull of a grin across her face as she stares at your wrists. “Ok, we can talk. But promise me this isn’t a break up. You have to or I’m not listening.”

You chuckle. It’s nice seeing her lighthearted demeanor like this again. “Yeah … yeah, I promise.”

She smiles and bites her lip, nodding at you in encouragement. “Then go ahead, baby. Tell me what—.”

Her hair is torn from her scalp. Her face is peeled free from any skin like an onion. Her skull shatters into a million pieces. Her brain, eyeballs, tongue, and facial muscles all vaporize into nothingness, leaving behind the scent of burnt meat that is carried off by wind pressure. 

All at once. All before your very eyes, Naoi Rei and the rest of the cafe explodes.

You couldn’t even scream because the moment your mind finally processes what just happened, the remnants of Cafe Oblivion start to melt into pixels until nothing but the darkness of the void is left behind.

Then, the words hang before your face: SIMULATION ENDED. REPEAT?

You alright in there, oppa? How was it? Is it at least stable enough for you?

You motion to vomit as you fall to your knees, but nothing comes out. You beat your chest in a few times before finally pressing your in-ear and replying to her, “God damn it, Leeseo … You should have warned me about it …”

Warn you about what? You already know what happened that day. I thought you’d already know what to do.

Oh, you know what happened that day alright. You remember what happened on that bloody fucking day. Something about tensions across the globe because of World War Three. Something about North Korea getting trigger happy with their missiles. Something about misfires. It was all over the news: thousands dead, millions displaced, and even more were left anxious and grieving.

You were one of them. Because that was the day you lost the love of your life.

That was the day Naoi Rei died.

And you couldn’t do anything about it—not back then at least. Now? Now you hope you can at least change something about that day.

Whether it’s for you, for her, or for the entire world, you aren’t sure yet. You just know you aren’t going to quit without trying. Which lead you here.

Ready to go again, oppa? The Mnemosynth automatically prepares the syncing each time. You know how it goes—whenever you’re ready again, just smoke it and it will handle the rest.

You lift the Mnemosynth to your lips, take a drag, and let all the smoke out. “Ok, let’s try this again.”

In a heartbeat, you’re brought back to that same point in time. You’re standing once again on the street, at four in the afternoon, just outside Cafe Oblivion.

And it feels so … real. The sunlight warms your skin. The heat pricks you until you sweat. The road beneath your feet—you can feel every bump and groove along the uneven asphalt. It’s so real, and yet you can’t believe this is all happening.

Just as you make your way to the cafe, the two teens from earlier bump into you mid-argument. They apologize, but you let it slide, dusting yourself off and pushing into the establishment. 

Before you can appreciate the smell of coffee, bread, and pastries, the waiter passing by reminds you that this is a non-smoking zone. You nod briefly and search the room for her, and when you see her sitting by the outdoor table, you dart towards her.

The view of her backside admiring the soon-to-set sun is tempting to fawn over, but you’re pressed for time. Instead, you tap her shoulder and hold her forearm. “Rei, we need to—.”

Rei screams and nearly spills her coffee. When she sees that it’s you, she pouts and slaps your chest repeatedly. “Ya! What was that for? You gave me a heart attack, gosh …”

You nod and you apologize, but you hold her firmly and tug on her twice. “Rei, please listen to me. We have to go. Something’s going to—.”

“Go? But I just got here,” she argues, not looking pleased with your insistence. “Besides, I’m waiting for Jiwon. I promised her we would go out for some coffee again today. It’s been years—.”

“Rei, look, I know you really want to see your best friend again, but please … PLEASE … I’m begging you … another time. You can meet her another time. But today, right now … I just … I need you to trust me and leave with me.”

Rei turns to your trembling hand by her wrist, then your other hand fidgeting by your waist, before finally settling at the pained expression on your face. “Oppa, you’re being weird. I don’t like it when you’re possessive like this—.”

Once again, you witness it.

Hair torn from her scalp. Skin ripped across her face. Bones shattering into fragments. Muscle and innards turning to dust.

You watch Rei die again as you become the sole survivor of the missile blast a second time around.

Falling to your knees, you’re somewhere between a panic attack and a bout of vertigo. How could you not? Even the fucking explosion was real. You’re sure that, at one point in your childhood, you’ve pondered on what it might be like in the midst of an explosion. Now, you just want that experience wiped clean from your mind.

As the walls and floors of Cafe Oblivion begin disintegrating into pixels to bring you back to the empty dark space again, you see the words hovering above you: SIMULATION ENDED. REPEAT?

Oppa, what happened this time? Got cold feet? 

You roll your eyes, speaking into your comms. “Back off, Leeseo. I’ve … I’ve got this.”